“The Beloved” has been interpreted in several different ways across a diversity of fields. In the Hindu, Jewish, and Christian traditions, “The Beloved” is the Divine calling us into a deeper more intimate relationship, often appearing in the respective traditions’ images of Divine embodiment – Krishna, Radha, Sita, Ram, Jesus, and in the Hebrew tradition – the Lover and Beloved in the book Song of Songs. In the world of psychology, “The Beloved” is the unintegrated parts of ourselves calling to be integrated within us. In the material world, “The Beloved” represents our desire for a healthy, interdependent, loving partnership.
In my own life, The Beloved has made himself known in a multitude of ways. While the Beloved had visited me prior to the vision I share here, this is the vision that propelled me in a search that has ultimately been about all of the above mentioned – a more intimate relationships with the Divine, a deeper relationship with Jesus, the unintegrated parts of myself (including my shadow), and the search for beloved partnership. This is a search that continues to unfold, revealing a multitude of challenges as well as a multitude of fruits. In this vision, I saw and knew for the first time, what it means to be adored and to be enthusiastically loved without condition, but also what it means to lose such a love.
It is a warm, sunny day. I am sitting on the crest of a grassy hill overlooking a small, medieval village. I am sitting in the center of a low stone circle and am aware of the smell of the grass beneath me, along with the faint smell of the sea as it is carried along the breeze. I can see the sea in the distance to the right of and behind me. The village is nestled in front of me at the bottom of the hill.
Dusk comes and I am aware of the sun setting behind me and to my right. I am dressed in a medieval peasant gown. As the sun sets, I watch as the town fires and torches are lit and as candlelight begins to glow from within the buildings and homes of the village.
The old druid, the keeper of the henge comes toward me. He joins me in the stone circle and beckons me to depart the circle and to take the stone-lined pathway down to the village. He says, “There, you will find what you are looking for.”
I descend the hill, guided by the totems of stones which line the path. I approach the village and am aware of the horses and carts, businesses closing, people walking and talking. The energy is peaceful and pleasant and I am aware that it is a time of peace. My thinking mind believes that it is in the church that I will find what I am looking for, but instead, I find I am led to a modest dwelling. I approach the dwelling and know that I do not need to knock – that I am welcome here.
I enter and see in the middle of the room a man stopped over a chair he is repairing. He looks up and smiles broadly at me. I feel my heart leap in my chest for the look he gives me is one of complete adoration and the deepest, most intimate and knowing love. He is filled with joy to see me. I feel completely loved and adored and held in the gaze of the complete safety of being fully known and fully loved.
He begins to rise to embrace me as our children burst past him, beating him to the hug. He stands back smiling proudly, lovingly and adoringly. We exchange a look of pure love, joy and contentment. As I gaze upon him, I see he is tall and dark with dark shoulder-length hair, messy from working and on his face is a closely cut beard with flecks of gray. He reminds of a combination of Jesus and Aragorn from Lord of the Rings.
After this vision of pure joy, I am aware of all the previous visions I had had of this man – of the life we had together, the joys, the gifts, how our respective gifts were expressed in this life, the great passion we had with each other….and of how it all came to an end when war come to our land and how he was killed in the war. I feel the overwhelming and excruciating pain of that loss and am brought to my knees with grief. My soul is torn in two and this is where the vision comes to an end.