Flipping through my journal yesterday, I came upon a poem I wrote that was inspired by a line from Rilke, “You are the partner to her loneliness.” The “You” to which Rilke is referring is God. Here is my poem as it speaks to my own longing and the longing known by every mystic and contemplative in their spiritual search.
Partner to My Loneliness
You are the partner to my loneliness.
Loneliness like the red-draped Excalibur eviscerating my soul in excruciating emptiness and pain.
Loneliness that is the longing that cannot be fulfilled
neither by coin, nor task, nor present company.
A longing that drives me to seek
beneath every shrub
under every pew
up on every shelf
around every corner
and through every door
. . . all for naught.
For the remedy to this loneliness is not to be found in the world of men,
neither is it to be found in my bed
nor in my mind
nor in the fleeting approval of others.
This longing is only fulfilled in you.
in the quiet recesses of my soul where life has cut a trail
made of the pain
of my unfulfilled hopes
and unsatisfied dreams.
It is only here, when wedded to you that I find my bliss
and know that I am home.
– 2013 Lauri Lumby